New York Times Idiot Thinks These Trump Losers Are The 'A-Gays'

Tell us, historians, how DO things tend to go for Hitler's queens?

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One more thing:

Now it’s time to yell at a New York Times idiot and make fun of some MAGA gay idiots and SO MUCH MORE.

Ernst Röhm in 1924

Lots of people are retelling the story this week of Ernst Röhm, one of Hitler’s early, most loyal Nazi soldiers. It’s coming up for a few reasons, but a big part of it is this garbage article in the New York Times on “Donald Trump’s Big Gay Government,” written by a hack named Shawn McCreesh, whom I first encountered last year when he broke the news that Trump fans in Bozeman, Montana, didn’t like this Kamala Harris woman very much. He’s a real talent.

Longtime gay activist Cleve Jones wrote on Facebook, “Trump's homosexuals might want to take a moment to review the story of Ernst Röhm. Because, as they say, history does tend to repeat itself. I see another night of long knives on the horizon.”

Another prominent activist named Kevin Jennings, who’s been in the fight for decades, posted this excerpt, a kind of CliffsNotes version of Röhm’s story: “[Ernst] Röhm was the co-founder and leader of the Sturmabteilung (SA), the Nazi Party's original paramilitary wing, which played a significant role in Hitler's rise to power…Röhm was known to be homosexual, which Hitler tolerated. Röhm was also known for being a good organizer, a strong leader and having a brutal, unscrupulous manner; all of which served Hitler well politically, before the Nazis obtained national power in 1933. […] On 30 June 1934, Hitler and a large group of SS and regular police flew to Munich and arrived between 06:00 and 07:00 at Hanselbauer Hotel in Bad Wiessee, where Röhm and his followers were staying. With Hitler's early arrival, the SA leadership, still in bed, were taken by surprise. SS men stormed the hotel and Hitler personally placed Röhm and other high-ranking SA leaders under arrest. […] Hitler was hesitant in authorising Röhm's execution, perhaps because of loyalty or embarrassment about the execution of an important lieutenant; he eventually did so.”

Writer Peter Birkenhead noted earlier in the week, responding to the raid on John Bolton’s house, “When historians tell the story of the Night of Long Knives the point isn’t, ‘That Nazi bastard Ernst Röhm got what he deserved,’ it’s, ‘That’s when Hitler began to use the power of the state against his critics and enemies.’”

Meanwhile, this easily impressed windsock from the New York Times McCreesh practically came on himself writing, “On the town with the A-Gays of Washington, who have never been happier to be out, proud and Republican.”

Oh my fucking God.

There are two kinds of Republican gays, in my experience:

• There’s the selfish kind, who value their status as wealthy white men far more than they can stomach the, to them, disgusting notion that they might be members of a minority. (There are obvious parallels and comparisons to be made here with Black Republicans and many of the Latino voters now shifting to the Republican party, many of whom, as Paola Ramos argues in her excellent book Defectors: The Rise of the Latino Far Right and What It Means for America, have embraced the Republican Party as part of a larger quest to prove that they, too, are white.) It’s a sort of white gay man who figured out decades ago that because they’re white men, they can get (some) Republicans to (sort of) accept them, or tolerate them, or at least agree to consider their white skin and their maleness and their money first. (Look at Scott Bessent, Trump’s gay Treasury secretary who comes across at all times like an inbred royal from a forgotten Monty Python sketch. He is the archetype of this kind of Republican gay.)

And yes, these are mostly white men — as most Republican gays are, in general — though I’ve encountered a certain brand of equestrian and/or golfing lesbian who also has embraced a similar kind of wealthy white privilege.

• Then there’s the truly self-hating kind, the ones who think they came out of the closet but didn’t really, not all the way. These are, again, mostly white men who grew up in conservative homes, in conservative churches, and who have tried to split the baby and have it both ways in their lives. They preserve the trappings of their fraudulent “straight” life by never fully embracing the possibilities of who they really are, and by looking down on those other LGBTQ people. They aren’t like those gays at the Pride parades with their shirts off and their jock straps and they certainly didn’t invite transgender deviants to their garden parties! See? They are just like the straight men they emulate and orbit, as they worshipfully try to fellate acceptance and belonging from those men’s auras! (And sometimes from their dicks, with the Christian Republican closet cases.) Except for this one tiny detail, they are the same! They have the same moral values! The same beliefs! They’re still Republicans, after all! Often with men like this — and this one really is a largely male phenomenon, in my experience — you’ll find that deep down, they really hate themselves, believe themselves to be deviant, or at the very least not “God’s ideal.” They cede the argument in advance that what God really wants is for them to marry women and boss them around and enthusiastically put their penises inside them in the heterosexual way, breeding out baby after baby for God’s army. Many of them deep down still live in terror that they’re going to go to hell when they die.

There’s a third kind, who carry within in them elements of the first two types, which makes sense when you remember that we’re talking about white men. Family wealth and deep religious self-loathing often go hand-in-hand, especially when you’re the one kid out of your Republican dad’s country club buddies who craves the big D (or the one who admits it).

There is not a fourth kind that’s just a good and normal and happy and decent person.

But to hear this dumbass from the New York Times tell it, the MAGA gays who staff Stupid Hitler’s second administration and/or swarm around it like cock-hungry pilot fish are the “A-Gays.”

This is the point where all actual A-Gays in all cities start laughing their fucking asses off at these stupid, vapid, unfuckable, substance-deprived little MAGA bitches and the New York Times writer who’s smitten with them.

In fact, judging by the number of them who have sent me this article, they’ve been laughing all week.

No Really, Look At These Dumb Queens

Does this dumpy boy look like an “A-Gay” to you?

That’s Charles Moran, the former quisling head of the Log Cabin Republicans, posing last year because he was so happy they took all the language out of the Republican platform calling for his beheading/persecution/whatever. (They did not remove it from Project 2025.)

The replies to his tweet were full of the inclusion and acceptance Republicans are known for, explaining how disgusting he and all LGBTQ people are. As I wrote at Wonkette at the time, “But hey, none of the Republican Nazis beat him up personally that day, so we guess that’s enough to make him feel like just one of the guys. You go to the RNC with the dignity you have, not the dignity you wish you had, we reckon.”

And that is the dignity with which we start this dogshit New York Times article.

McCreesh explains that Moran, who is somehow only 44 — hate ages people — “is the pasha of a new power tribe in the capital: the gay men of the Trump administration.”

And I guess these losers told McCreesh they’re the “A-Gays,” and he, like a real journalist, didn’t feel the need to interrogate the assertion:

These are the A-Gays. They’re (mostly) out, they’re proud (to work for President Trump) and they have big jobs inside (or alongside) this administration. They wield influence all over town, from the Pentagon to the State Department to the White House to the Kennedy Center.

“We’re like Visa,” Mr. Moran said. “Everywhere you want to be.”

Golly, that sounds like a joke an “A-Gay” would make, don’t you think?

They’re overwhelmingly white and tend to have a certain kind of look. Close cropped haircuts. Windowpane suits. Golf shorts. They’re not the type to be telling anyone their pronouns or using the word “queer.” And they aren’t the least bit offended that the leader of their party continues to stoke a moral panic about transgender people.

Hey, I also have just made up a joke! What do you call a Nazi who sucks cock? A Nazi.

McCreesh explains that “the A-Gays worship Melania Trump,” because I guess even washed up gay Republicans need somebody to scream “DIVAAAAAAAA!” at, and when no gay icon of quality or integrity wants you, you queen out over table scraps.

He explains that the “A-Gays turned out in force” for the Stupid Hitler Kennedy Center performance of Les Misérables, which they of course all went to, and then they got mad because some drag queens showed up and were mean, ew gross, drag queens, Trump gays are far too masculine for drag queens, can’t you tell how manly they are?

“I hang out with my straights just as easily as I hang out with my gays,” says Moran at one point in the article, the exact way confident, masculine gay guys say things when they are definitely just one of the guys.

Obviously, these are not the “A-Gays.” Not in DC, not in any city. And amusingly enough, McCreesh admits as much in his own article, seemingly without noticing that he’s self-debunked his own thesis.

But there is a kind of paradox about these men’s existence in Washington. They live in the gayest city in America, which is also pretty much the most Trump-hating city in America.

The gay men who work for him here are keenly aware that they are in hostile territory, surrounded by other gay men who consider them self-deluded traitors or worse. At gay bars around town and on dating apps they are either iced out or confronted about the things this president has said and done. He cut AIDS relief around the world and H.I.V. vaccine research and funding for L.G.B.T.Q. suicide prevention services. He called drag shows “anti-American.” His defense secretary announced during Pride month that the Navy Vessel named after Harvey Milk would be renamed. Perhaps most worrying for many gay people is how conservative the Supreme Court has become thanks to Mr. Trump. Could same-sex marriage go the way of Roe? It’s not out of the question.

Gay men who are “surrounded” by people who “consider them self-deluded traitors or worse,” who are persona no fucka on Grindr and also in public, are by definition not the “A-Gays,” you hack.

McCreesh continues:

But when these men do step outside their world, they are often reminded that they are not welcome in the flourishing gay scene that surrounds them.

“I will say, if people at a gay bar find out that you’re in the Trump administration or you’re working somewhere like the Kennedy Center, they are not nice to you — they instantly come at you,” [said one young particularly airheaded little 34-year-old MAGA queen named Casey Flores, who doesn’t actually work for the administration, but who is apparently really jonesing for an invite to Peter Thiel’s house and launders his begging for it through this article]. “I definitely don’t lead with it.”

Very “A-Gay,” very alpha.

McCreesh does bother to get some quotes from actual DC gays, and they comport themselves well. Jason Melton, 44: “If you work in the Trump administration, and you’re a gay person, clearly you have no respect for yourself.” He further explained that even if one of these self-loathing gay MAGA Nazi bastards was hot, they’d instantly become ugly if he found out who they worked for.

A Democratic Capitol Hill staffer told McCreesh (paraphrase) that “You can either party with the gays on Fire Island, or you can cut funding for AIDS programs, but you can’t do both.”

But hey, Charles Moran isn’t worried! He says when his gay Republican DC friends are feeling down in the dumps about the 24/7 rejection, he reassures them they can still be an “A-Gay” even if the entire gay community in your city and every other city loathes your quisling ass, and here’s how:

“But you know what I tell people?” he said. “If you’re not getting invited to the cool kids table, go make your own cool kids table.”

Like a bunch of mean, bitter kids with Charlie Kirk’s face and smelling of body odor all deciding to sit together at lunch, hissing at the cheerleaders and football players that these seats are taken, you can’t sit here!!!!!

Which Brings Us Back To Röhm

The dippy one Flores who works at the Kennedy Center, who’s obviously yet too old to be the town twink even for these losers, whines:

“Nobody is meaner to gay people than other gay people,” he insisted. “Left-wing gays hate socially conservative Christians more than that group of people hates the gays, and I think that’s on public display every day on social media and elsewhere.”

There’s that self-loathing I was talking about.

McCreesh was wondering if it’s difficult for these people to be rejected by their own community of gays and also by the MAGA community where they’re desperate to belong, considering how it’s run by vicious anti-gay Christian nationalist bigots like Pete Hegseth. Nah, he said. Note how he fully embraces the idea that anti-gay conservative Christians are the real victims here.

You know, the people who believe he deserves to rot on a spit in hell for his sinful desire for hot, hard man-fuckin’.

And who, then, are the victimizers, in this young man’s mind?

There’s kind of two things happening in this article. You have some of these deluded Marys bragging that Donald Trump has a shitty, campy 1980s Andrew Lloyd Webber sort of gay taste, which comes directly from all the time he spent licking Roy Cohn’s sack (figuratively!) in the ‘70s and ‘80s. This is almost the entirety of their defense of the fantasy that MAGA really loves them.

“This idea that Republicans hate gays, that’s just so not the case,” protests Flores, who says he’s not worried about the Supreme Court overturning Obergefell, because he’s heard there are some “protections” now or something? (McCreesh helpfully notes that he means the Respect For Marriage Act, signed by *COUGH!* Joe Biden.)

And then you have things like that quote from Flores above, the one about conservative Christians being the real victims of hate, which is a good example of the gay Republican tendency to believe that whatever bad happens to them, they probably deserve it, shameful reprobates unlovable by God or man that they are.

That’s what brings us back to Röhm. Because if these useful quislings really think they win in the end and the Christian nationalists and Project 2025 creeps lose the war for the soul of MAGA, they’re delusional. But again, because so many of them are so thoroughly self-loathing, they’re likely to think deep down that they deserve that outcome anyway.

Because, you see, at some point, Donald Trump is going to die of “cankles” or “rotting hands,” rapid onset dementia or God knows what else. And if he takes too long, I’m reasonably certain the techno-theocrats, Project 2025 predators, and Christian nationalists actually driving and bankrolling the movement, represented by their puppet JD Vance and the TheoBro creeps who surround him, are going to find some way to push him out. (Just this week, JD Vance has been musing with a half-chub like he’s been window-shopping at Ashley Furniture Homestore that he’s ready to take over if Trump bites it.)

Pete Hegseth’s Pervy Christian Nationalist Daddy Goes To Washington

Trump was never their true hero. He’s their imperfect populist vessel, the crude pig who convinced the other crude pigs to agree to open the door for white supremacist Christian fascism. Trump made that bargain when he chose Mike Pence the first time around. He made it again with Vance. These people believe Trump was chosen by God to play this role for them. Trump isn’t their savior, or their endgame. He’s a means to their real end.

What then for the Trump gays? Do they think they’re not in the Martin Niemöller quote, that they have some kind of special dispensation that will protect them along with the Black Republicans and Latinos, once they have ceased to serve the Nazis’ purpose?

As Kevin Jennings wrote in his Röhm post, “There’s fools, and then there’s damn fools.”

And these selfish, self-loathing little MAGA bitches are damn fools.

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